A snapshot of mood swings

Yesterday was a good day - lots of time with kids, and some classes really cracked me up (there are now MANY Korean middle school girls who have crushes on my nephew from the pictures I showed when I talked about my family) and afterschool I played in the highly competitive teachers' "sports day" volleyball game. Last week I wasn't able to play due to internet acquisition issues, so today was the first time. Being the tallest woman in town has its advantages. I played well enough to earn respect, but not so well that the "good" players were embarrassed. My principal was impressed, they are moving me to "attacker" position (here, they don't rotate. they also can kick the ball. who knew?), and I garnered a lot of goodwill by trying.

After, I had water delivery started in my apartment. The water here is not drinkable, and people even recommend cooking and brushing teeth with filtered water. The delivery serivce is less expensive then buying or renting a filter, and the dispenser it comes with can be plugged in to provide either hot or cold water. I unplugged it because I'm cheap like that and it seems wasteful for the amount I would use it, but it's kind of cool nonetheless.

And at the gym, I ran 5k for the first time in weeks. It was on the treadmill and it was hot, but afterwards I remembered why I love running. After running and lifting legs reasonably hard, I felt at peace. Like hitting a reset button. Oh, and I found brown rice at the market.

All in all, a very nice day. I felt like I'm starting to build at least the foundations for a life here.

Today was a low. It started out pretty great - my classes went well, the kids made me laugh, and students are coming up to me to ask little questions and try to get my attention all the time - I am trailed by middle school students calling out, "Je-she-ka!! Hi!! Hello! Je-she-ka Teacher!! Hello!" But the afternoon was spent watching an older woman dominate the hell out of the other women in my workshop at the elementary school and issues with my school reimbursing my flight and giving me the relocation money outlined in my contract, (I was told that the person responsible for making the payment had said I would get it, "sooner or later" - WTF??! are you kidding me?!) and feeling like the social order here is near to impossible for me to navigate, or at least manipulate to my liking. I am a youngish unmarried woman, which means basically I have no status, but I'm a foreigner, which means I don't have to play by all their rules. I'm in a grey area, and I'm just not sure what I really can and cannot do. Which eventually led to me crumpling like a house of cards.

So much of the time I feel like I am on the edge of good or bad and I just don't know onto which side I'll fall.